My last ME day was 5 years, 9 months and 28 days ago…

That actually equals 2,129 days. Last night was my last on-campus class for this term. We ran 15 minutes late because my teacher can’t tell time and we all needed to give our presentations.  Once we finally got done, I had to drive 40 minutes home and I also needed to stop at the grocery store because Tim only had 1 bagel left.  Once I finally got home at 10:30pm I needed to cut up the pineapple and put it in to dishes for lunch and then I gave my hubby some Noosa yogurt (the strawberry rhubarb one is AMAZING to dip pineapple in), packed my lunch for today, took out the trash, filled the fridge with water, hung up the wet laundry that was in the washer, and hopped into the shower.

While I was in the shower, I thought to myself, when was the last time I had a day, just to myself, where I didn’t do ANYTHING for anyone else? I honestly cannot remember. I want to preface this with the fact that I am 100% to blame for this.  I put everyone before myself and then even get mad or cranky about it. Its like I enjoy the punishment. I blame my mom for this. She would always ask me and my sister for help as kids and if we didn’t jump up the second she asked, she would just say forget it and do it herself. That is now me. I even noticed when I went to Wiscony to visit, my mom was in the kitchen the entire time getting stuff ready for everyone else even though she is sick.  Why ask someone else to do something when you know you can do it and it will be done right.

Its hard to fit in time for me when I am surprisingly pretty low maintenance and I don’t need much. My husband tells me quite frequently how lucky he is that I don’t ask for much so I’m sort of shooting myself in the foot because now I have an image to uphold. Why make time for me when I have a 10 year old that needs my help and a husband who has the worlds most stressful/dangerous job. I cant complain because he and his dad have been building a room in our basement on his days off, he manages the finances, and takes care of all the outside stuff that I’m not the least bit interested in. We could have grass 15 feet high and I wouldn’t care.

Anywho, back to the shower. Did you know I’m a massage therapist? Did you know that as self-care, we should all be getting massages like once a month simply to maintain our bodies? Do you know the last time I went and got a massage all by myself just for ME? 5 years, 9 months, 28 days ago. This is just pitiful. I’m not going to lie and say I NEVER do anything for myself, like, spend a few extra minutes at Target looking at clearance clothes that I’m not going to buy because their clearance is still too expensive. 3bc244d6d42a357a21846d4bb52588eaBut this is NOT self-care. Everyone needs to take a day away from their kids, family, friends, spouse etc. and just spend a day doing things for themselves and NO ONE ELSE. I don’t do things for myself because I feel selfish but that is just complete nonsense. We need to take better care of ourselves because we are the only “me” we’ve got!

I need to make time to exercise every day because this is an important part of self-care too. I need time to just sit and think instead of thinking about the sink full of dirty dishes, the basement full of dirty laundry and the 3 baseball games this week. Seriously. Three. No worrying about homework, my horrific commute, or what’s for dinner. I’m not saying these things aren’t important because they are. We need to worry about these things every day but we have to stop putting ourselves on the backburner. Maybe you are not guilty of this and if you’re not, I commend you. But I am and I vow today, to stop. Take a day and do you. Ok. Bye Felicia.



5 thoughts on “My last ME day was 5 years, 9 months and 28 days ago…

  1. I was the same exact way for decades, always doing for others and rarely taking time for myself. Then, two years ago, through an odd alignment of things coming together, I was able to retire. Since then, I’ve spent quite a lot time doing exactly what I wanted, and I don’t feel the least bit guilty. I figure it will take several more years before the scales are finally balanced out and I find a new balance of equally helping myself and others. This little story probably doesn’t help you much in your current situation, but just know that sometimes the good karma you put out does come back to you, eventually..

    Liked by 1 person

  2. I am one of those people that often puts myself last. The reason being, I like the feeling of doing things for other people. It is a solely selfish act. I do this for myself. Doing things for others makes me feel like I have done good for humanity, whether I know the person or not. Often I don’t even tell people what I have done. I just let them think that magical fairies and elves came in and did everything.

    Besides, when your kid is all grown up do you think he is going to sit around and complain that you were never there? That you never did anything for him?

    Enjoy this time, you will have so much time for YOU throughout life. Not to mention all the Mom Guilt you will have saved up.

    Liked by 1 person

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